The L in ‘LUCK” stands for love and the complexity of this emotion is never lost on me. Loving someone else is a natural process yet the idea of loving self become complicated, conditional, and at times unfeasible. I wonder why it seems so natural to experience love for others and so unnatural to experience love for our own self?
When our friends make mistakes, we can rationalize their behavior and even experience compassion for them even when their actions may have directly impacted us. However, we are unable to find that compassion and understanding for ourselves quickly, if at all, sometimes. We hold ourselves to standards that can be impossible. We judge ourselves constantly and compare what we ‘should’ be versus accepting exactly what we are in this moment.
Have we ever examined a relationship in our lives and thought, “if only they were perfect, had no flaws, and made no mistakes…I could love them more?” So why in the world do we hold ourselves to an unattainable and undesirable standard? Not only are we able to accept flaws and imperfections in others, but we find value in them. Those are the traits that endear us to them and make them unique and full of character. We find tolerance through our experience of love for them.
I wonder what amazing things would happen if today we all started only one resolution….to simply love and accept ourselves completely as we are? This is not to suggest that we can’t explore ways to become more aware or gain more understanding and knowledge of ourselves and acknowledge opportunities for continued growth. It’s simply an invitation to accept that who we are at this very moment is worthy of love and that we don’t have to wait until we are ‘better’ to fully engage in self-love.
I fully believe that loving our self leads to a better sense of well-being, happiness, and peace which transcends into more peace, love, and happiness around us. My resolution for this year? More love. Absolutely.
And, you are so right about learning to ‘accept’ ourselves. I am thinking about the connection between real acceptance of my self as the basis of compassion and kindness and self-love. Maybe that’s all it is…just accepting all of myself the way I try to do with others…as you so well point out!! bravo!!
Yes! I believe acceptance is so powerful in how we view and ultimately treat ourselves. Sounds so simple, yet quickly becomes so complicated. Ah, that’s why we call it a ‘practice’, right? 🙂
I am learning to ‘take care of myself,” which sounds so strange to me. I wonder sometimes if people have any self-knowledge in our culture to know who they really are and how to treat THAT person. Do we know ‘how to’ do self-understanding in our culture along with the self-love that goes along with it? Great thoughts.
I totally agree and that is why I am so passionate about this! It wasn’t until I began to focus on my ‘self’ that I realized a primary barrier for my happiness was a lack of self-awareness and understanding. It’s amazing how kindness and love for self transcends our experiences with others. Thanks for your feedback. Happy New Year! 🙂